Before reading this, I would suggest taking a peak at any of
the stories on here by the authors. Atleast skim. =) This was
written purely to torture Scott and I on our respective b-days
:P It has no effect on Fall From Grace or any of Scott
"Cyclops" Summerton's writings.

Hold on to your subtitles, it's dub time!
As always, Sailor Moon ain't mine.

*********************************************************

	Angie suddenly realized that she was on the phone.
	She also realized she was wearing some rather thick
clothing, yet still felt rather cold.
	Angie realized she was sick.
	But who was she?
	Before she could figure that out she heard someone
on the other end of the phone.
	"She's on her way to your place, this is just a
warning...  Be careful Raye"
	"Rei?"  Angie did a happy dance.  "I'm Rei!"
	"Raye, are you sure you're alright?"
	"Of COURSE I'm alright I can be with Usag--"  She
paused and narrowed her eyes.  "Lita?" she asked tentatively.
	"Yeah?  *ACHOO!*  What is it Raye?"
	She should have been glad it wasn't the Lita from
Scott's fanfiction and instead was a 'local'.  However,
something more important troubled her...
	"Aw SHIMATTA I'm in the DUB!"
	Lita sounded worried.  "Raye?  Are you sure you'll
be ok?"
	"Yeah yeah Mak--Lita, I'll be fine, I--"
	Suddenly a WAY too cheery "HIIIII!" nearly deafened
both Angie and Lita as Mina entered the Cherry Hill Temple.
	"Hi Raye!  I'm here to make you all better!"
	Angie's eyes went swirly.  "What are you doing...
*ACHOO!*"  She paused.  "Oh kami-sama...  I'm in the NURSE
MINAKO dub episode?!"
	Scott smiled a brilliant smile, for Mina's body was
currently inhabited by him.  "Hi?"

===============================================================

"When Plutos Attack!"
        By Scott "Cyclops" Summerton and Emporess with His
Gothship DarkSong
        (thrawn27@hotmail.com, emporess88@hotmail.com,
darksong@worldserpent.org)

Chapter Five - "Blondage"

===============================================================

	"You're filling out that sweater rather nicely
Scott-chan..."
	Scott looked down at the green sweater and frowned.
Though he was happy there was that large red bow on the top
of his head keeping all that blonde hair behind him, Mina's
bangs still hung over his big blue eyes.  Of course there were
the two large protrusions clearly visible in the sweater
proving he was again stuck as a female, that is if the little
pleated orange skirt and shoes that strangely resembled those
of Sailor Venus didn't.  The little white knee-high socks,
all too-purple winter coat and big red scarf tied around his
neck only emphasized the fact.
	However, he wasn't stuck in an anime he didn't know
this time.  This time he was in the Sailor Moon dub, and he
was very happy about that.
	Angie wasn't however.
	Not only was she trapped in the Sailor Moon dub, but
she was trapped within the 'Nurse Venus' episode, completely
ruining her fun within her bedridden Raye Hino body.
	She smiled when Artemis hopped onto the bed though.
"Good Izzy-chan!  I'm so happy you found us!"
	"I still can't believe you have a tentacle monster..."
	"A KAWAII tentacle monster-chan!" corrected Angie.
	Scott continued undaunted.  "...as a pet.  How did he
even get here from 'Pretty Fly (For A Hentai)' anyway?"
	"None of the anime or fanfics we've been too so far
had mascots for Izzy-chan to hop into until Artemis here
in this one."
	"Um, what about Chu-Chu in Utena?"
	Izzy merely glared at him, which would have looked
rather strange to the Sailor Scouts of this world since it
appeared to be Artemis glaring almost hatefully at Mina.
He turned back to Angie and chirped a distasteful noise.
	"Squick."
	Scott's blue Mina eyes boggled.  "What the heck was
that?"
	"Izzy-chan's kawaii mascot noise!" cheered Angie
gleefully.  "His first one too!" she added proudly.
	"But I thought he talked normally when we saw him in
'Pretty Fly'..."
	Angie would have patted Scott atop his blonde-haired
head if she wasn't as ill as her borrowed body.  "Don't stress
your dub-brain Scott-chan.  He only speaks like that around us.
When he's near others he only says "squick"-chans!"
	"But why didn't he talk normally just now?"
	"Because we aren't alone Minak-- er, Mina."
	Scott blinked.  "Wha--?"  Then he suddenly realized
two hands groping his ample chest, and they weren't Angie's
hands this time.
	Scott spun around to see Raye's grandfather in all his
glory.  "You pervert!" he shouted pushing him out of the room.
He readjusted his sweater...  and bra.
	Angie looked mildly surprised.  "I didn't think he was
that blatant in the dub..."
	"Maybe we had something to do with it just by being
here..." began Scott until he suddenly paused and pointed to
Izzy.  "Hey, isn't he supposed to be in this basket?" he asked
as he held it up.
	Angie looked forlornly at him.  "You really ARE a
dub-boy if you know the episode off by heart."  She paused and
watched him set the basket down and take off the purple coat,
then smirked.  "Well, still a dub-'girl' that is."
	Scott frowned again.  "Isn't the episode relatively
the same subbed though?  AND one of your favourites at that?"
	Angie nonchalantly waved him off.  "That's not the
point now is it?"  She then looked at him expectantly.
"Well?  Shouldn't you be off making me my porridge?
	Scott blinked.  "I thought it was supposed to be soup?"
	Angie shrugged.  "Either or, you're supposed to be
taking care of me!"  She gave the V salute which looked
somewhat ridiculous coming from Raye Hino.  "Hop to it,
V-chan!"

	Upon returning Scott had managed to find his way
around the place and scramble together ingredients for the
soup.  Angie took a big spoonful into her mouth...
	...and began to blow flames on the frantic Scott.
	He quickly handed her some water.  Milk would have
been a better choice but he IS only a dub-boy remember.  "Are
you OK?"
	She downed the glass in one gulp.  "Yeah, but it's
only supposed to be too salty, what happened?"
	"This is the dub.  It's spicy soup here, not salty
porridge."  He began to reach for the bowl.  "I'll take it
away..."
	"NO!" she shrieked.  "If you do that you spill it all
over me and knock me off the bed on the process!  It's fine
where it is for now."
	Scott shrugged.  "OK, but it's not my fault, it's
Mina's."
	"But you ARE Mina, Scott-chan."
	"I'm trying to ignore that fact for the moment..."
	"Yare yare, just get on with the episode and put on
the sea tape."
	Scott's eyes ballooned as he fished the cassette from
a skirt pocket.  "'Sounds Of The Sea'?"
	She shrugged.  "It's close enough to 'Alpha-Waves' for
me."
	The blonde girl slumped.  "But this is gonna hurt a LOT."
	Angie's eyes narrowed.  "Do it, blondie."
	After the ensuing ruckus and explosion, Scott collapsed
onto the bed in an attempt to avoid any and all technology to
prevent further disasters.
	"Scott-chan?  I know something you could do that would
be safe."  She smirked.  "Lotsa fun too."
	He turned to face her, absently brushing the long hair
from his face as he did.  "Hmm?"
	"It's kinda personal..." stated Angie glancing at the
open door.
	Scott was curious.  He quickly closed the door and
turned back to the bed.  "What did you want me to do?"
	"Wear the nurse outfit."
	"Uh, are you sure I should do that this soon in the
epi--"
	He was suddenly interrupted as Angie grabbed the neck
of his sweater with both hands and pulled his face close to
hers.  "Wear it, Scott.  Wear it NOW." she demanded.
	Scott's golden Mina eyebrows shot up when he noticed
the lust in her borrowed voice as it was practically dripping
with it.  Any interest was killed completely however when
Angie's nose began to drip as well.
	Scott meekly held a box towards Angie.  "Tissue?"
	Though the reaction was surprising, it was still
similar enough to the original scream of the episode to cause
Scott to quickly flee from Raye's and head on to Serena's in
an (vain?) attempt to continue the plotline.
	Surprisingly Izzy quickly followed in his little
white cat body...

	"Are you sure about that Raye?  I know she's a klutz
but she's not THAT bad is she?"
	After nodding and making affirmative tones on the
phone a couple times, Serena's eyes abruptly boggled.
	"Put WHAT in WHERE with WHO?!"  Suddenly a high
pitched wail cut through the air.  "I gotta go Raye..."
A look of extreme curiosity crossed her face as did a sly
smile.  "But I'll definitely be talking to you about that
and those later..."
	As she thought, the little spore had gotten into
trouble again, this time losing a freshly washed sheet over
the balcony to the street below.
	Whether or not Rini almost fell two stories down
along with it isn't as important since she unfortunately
didn't loose grip of the railing.
	After a brief arguement between Serena and Rini and
the leaving of Serena's mother Irene due to a headache, a new
voice shouted up from the street below.
	"Um, I'm a little tangled up here...  wait a sec...
a ha!  Here we go...  no wait...  almost...  there!"
	And with that, Mina cast the sheet aside and leaped to
the second story balcony with a single bound.
	The blonde pointed at both Serena and Rini.  "I'm
here to help you get better Serena!"
	Serena's stunned expression was almost equal to that
of Scott's, which he was thankfully able to keep hidden.
"How the hell did I make that jump?" he thought.  "And talk
about corny speeches!"
	"Uh, Mina, I'm fine, really..."  Before she could
continue Serena suddenly broke into a minor coughing fit.
	"Nope, you're going to bed right this instant!"
One blonde girl began to shove the other inside the with the
little pink-haired one trailing behind them.  "And don't
worry Serena, I'll take care of Rini..."  Once inside Scott
mumbled under his breath in as sinister a tone as Mina could
muster, which ended up quite pathetic.  "I'll take care of
her alright..."
	"SQUICK!"
	"AAAAAHHHHH!"
	As the little black streak zoomed by and was chased
by a little white streak, Serena looked dumbstruck.  "I
thought Luna was feeling really sick too..."
	Scott put one hand behind his head and giggled.
"Izz--Ah, Artemis is always good at keeping her on her toes
isn't he!"  Scott continued to shove Serena into her room.
"Now you lie down and I'll be right back to keep you well!"
As he left the room he mumbled "Or something like that..."
	"Here Mina!  Wear this!"
	Scott just stared at Rini's cheerful face...
	...and the tight little nurse dress she held out
towards him.
	As he took the outfit in two slender hands, Scott
shook his head and sighed.  "The things I do for story
continuity..."
	After much struggling, near falls and impressive
acrobatics, Scott had somehow managed to fit his Mina body
into the so-snug-it's-too-tight one-piece nurse's dress.
Scott cheered upon realizing that Rini lacked the foresight
to include a set of high heels which would have been all-too
appropriate.  "At least my luck is holding out in that
regard." he said whilest donning a pair of fluffy slippers
instead.
	Scott proceeded to make a fool of himself in front
of Serena (as if there was any doubt he wouldn't) which
resulted in him renacting most of the episode's events and
leading to his falling down the stairs to do chores for
Serena's mother.  He was more than eager to oblige since it
allowed him to remove the nurse's outfit and put on Mina's
regular clothes.
	Doing the dishes and failing.  Doing the laundry
and failing.  Vaccuming and failing.  All more than just
failed attempts at cleaning, but also failed attempts at
eliminating Rini once and for all.  Whether or not Serena
eventually fainted because she was ill or because she
caught Scott trying to axe the spore is up for debate.
	After helping Serena to her bedroom, Scott
suddenly heard a faint beeping noise.  He made sure Rini
was inside the room as well and closed the door behind her
while remaining out in the hall.  After rummaging in a
skirt pocket he retrieved the culprit: a Scout
communicator.  Fumbling to press the tiny buttons with
elegant fingernails, it took Scott forever to activate the
little device.  When he finally succeeded he didn't notice
that the Angie (wearing the face of Raye Hino) was staring
at him when he said...
	"Ow!  I broke a nail!"
	The little image of Raye blinked.  "That's not
exactly what I was hoping to hear Scott-ch-- er, Mina."
	Scott stuck out his tongue at the small screen.
"Hi Ang-- uh, Raye."  This time Scott blinked.  "Why are
you contacting me?"
	"I got tired of waiting for you so I got everybody
together already!"
	Scott balked at the screen.  "You what?!"
	Angie remained indignant.  "I gathered everyone up
and we're already at the hospital waiting for you!"
	"You shouldn't go changing things like that!  What
if you just changed an entire actual episode of Sailor
Moon?!"  He paused in thought for a second.  "Did we alter
that Utena episode too?"
	"Who cares?"  She smirked.  "The Sailor Moon one is
only a dub episode and Utena is so whacked no one will
notice anyway."  She smirked.  "So when are you guys getting
here?"
	Scott frowned.  "If you think I'm bringing Rini
along you can just forget about that."
	"Didn't you JUST say we shouldn't change the epi--"
	"This is different." interrupted Scott.  "Spore bad.
Plus Serena JUST fainted and won't wake up for a while."
	She sighed.  "Alright alright, just get here soon
ok?  I wanna leave here!"
	Scott nodded and deactivated the communicator,
breaking another nail in the process.  With closed eyes
and clenched teeth he muttered "On my way..."

	Angie stood outside the entrance to the hospital
lobby.  With her were Lita (last name never revealed) and
Amy (Anderson?  no one really knows...), both as snuggled
into thick clothes as she was.
	Though her borrowed body was Japanese and somewhat
accustomed to snowy winters, Angie's still an Atlanta native,
and the fact that there was snow around was having a profound
psychological effect on the girl...
	She made snow angel-chans!
	Of course that was after she pelted passers-by with
snowballs and built a family of ecchitomically correct
snowpeople.
	Naturally Scott missed all of this as Angie stopped
before he caught her in the act.  Huffing and puffing, Mina
joined the group.
	"Where's Serena?" asked a confused Lita.
	"Uh, she had a fainting spell and is sleeping it off
now." replied Scott.  "Rini's with her, they'll be by later
I think."
	"Um, I sense some...  what they hell were they
called...  uh, nasty vibes!  That's it, from the Dark Moon,
or is it Black Moon?  Then there's the Dark Hedge, and the
Gate Of Darkness, or Dark Gate...  ah the hell with it!"
	With that Angie raised her transformation wand and
shouted "Mars Star Power, Make-U--  YAAAAH!!!"
	Momentarily forgetting she was in the dub Angie
proceeded to shout nearly the entire Japanese henshin phrase
when the "Make-Up!" part was unecessary.  Because of this she
was taken aback when suddenly surrounded by flames initiating
her transformation sequence into Sailor Mars.
	Scott fared better as he simply shouted "VENUS STAR
POWER!" at the top of his lungs much like the dub characters
normally do.  He wasn't prepared for the transformation itself
however, comprising of a nekkid flash coupled with ribbons of
stars flying all over the place.
	When all was said and done, the four Sailor Scouts
stood staring into the reflective glass of the doors.  Scott
stared at his features as he placed a hand on the glass for
balance from the sight.  The glamour effect had taken the
Love Scout's already incredible beauty and enhanced it
exponentially, assisted of course by the golden tiara
perched on his forehead which he traced with a finger.
The 'glamour effect' of the Sailors was truly that.
	The Sailor suit itself wasn't all that different
from what he'd already worn as Miyuki-chan, save the snug
white bodice of course, and the skirt resembled what Mina
had been wearing previously anyway.
	Regardless, he ended up ultimately staring
absolutely dumbstruck at a slender gloved hand.
	"Holy cow...  I'm actually a Sailor Scout..."  He
blinked.  "How am I expected to fight evil all dolled up
like this?"
	Now done thoroughly, and we mean -thoroughly- here
people, examining her own transformed Scout body, Angie
came up beside him.  "Holy...  -cow?-"
	Scott shrugged.  "I guess I can't swear...  it IS
the dub you know."
	"But I can, see?" stated Angie as she proceeded to
prattle off a startling number of expletives.
	"Drats!  That's not fair!  Why can't I?" pouted the
blonde Scout.
	"Because you're a dubbie." replied the Fire Scout
as Scott facefaulted.
	As he stood up he glanced downward.  "Wow, nice
legs..."
	Angie blushed.  "Why thank you, Scott-chan!"
	Scott thrust out one of his own long Mina legs and
posed.  "Actually I meant my own..."
	The resulting smack nearly knocked the red bow and
tiara right off of his head, and as he tried to keep his
balance he began to stumble backwards.  Thankfully he was
caught by Sailor Jupiter who helped him stay upright.
	"Venus, are you ok?" she asked.
	Scott looked at his feet and groaned.  They had
finally appeared.  What he had evaded from anime to fanfic
to anime had finally caught up with him.  His luck had run
out.
	Heels.
	Little itty-bitty orangy-gold high heels.
	Yes the heels themselves were somwehat wide and only
about an inch or two high, but there was no doubt in Scott's
mind.  He had to wear heels as Sailor Venus.
	"I guess it's a small price to pay if I get Scout
powers, which is better than I had as Utena..."  He took a
tentative step then looked down at his feet again.  "Stupid
heels with stupid ankle-band things..." he mumbled as he
watched Angie walk towards the door in her own red heels.
"I can't see how you can walk in those things."
	Angie glowed.  "What?  My Mars 'fuck-me' pumps?
It's real simple!  See, you just--"
	She teetered...
	"WhoaAAAAAH!!"
	...then fell over.
	Scott signed as he watched Angie pick up the garnet
which she had just dropped, then helped her back to her feet.
"What did I write for 'Divided Destiny' again?  Oh yeah,
'heel toe, heel toe...'"
	Angie merely stated that she 'wasn't going to fall
over anymore because of the fuck-me pumps' and that was that.
	As Scott somehow struggled his way through the
entranceway with Angie expertly prancing behind him, Sailors
Mercury and Jupiter merely shared a wide-eyed glance and
simultaneously said "Huh?" before following on inside
themselves.

	Sneaking their way through the halls meant walking on
tip-toes to avoid the clicking of heels giving off sound,
temporarily allowing Scott to somewhat keep his balance for
more than three seconds at a time.  The four girls whispered
a battle plan as they headed towards the enemy's suspected
location.
	"It's Esmeraldo alright, and she has..."  Angie
paused in mock concentration.  "Her henchmonster is called
Pharmako, and she shoots giant needles from one arm and has
a big scalpel for the other arm."
	Sailor Jupiter was impressed.  "Wow Mars, your psychic
readings really improved all of a sudden!"
	Angie put a hand behind her head and giggled softly.
"I'm just that good I suppose!"
	Suddenly Angie DID have to pause in thought however,
as her dub body actually began to detect the enemy.  "Come
on you buffet tabl--  I MEAN guys, it's over this way."
	Scott joined Angie in the lead.  "Um, are you sure
this is a good idea?  Sneak attacking the enemy when we
don't even know what using Scout powers will feel like?"
	"Don't worry about it, V-chan!  You get to jump up on
the ledge and distract them while we take them out from below!"
	Scott stopped dead in his tracks.  "I'm going to
what?!"
	"You remember, ne?  You're up on that little beam
balancing as you give a little speech."
	"Sounds risky, but Venus DOES have the best balance
of the four of us."  Sailor Jupiter looked warily at Scott
swaying slightly as he walked.  "Well, usually anyway."
	"I agree." stated Sailor Mercury.  "A diversionary
tactic would help us dispose of this medical waste product
more efficiently than a full frontal assault."
	Angie groaned.  "I was hoping we'd avoid that
line..."  She stopped abruptly.  "Anyway, we're here!  Up you
go Venus!" she stated with a grin.
	Scott glanced upwards at the tiny beam.  "I just KNOW
I'm going to fall off..." he thought while leaping into the
air.  Amazingly he landed gracefully and by standing on his
toes he kept decent balance.
	That was when Rini showed up.
	It was a necessary evil however, as it drew out
Emerald and her henchwench into the open.  Scott started
to ramble.
	"Hold it right there!  I if you think you can get
away with making people sick, think again!  I'm Sailor
Venus!  And in the name of Venus, I'll punish you!"
	Emerald glared upward at him.  "You bothersome
Sailor brat!  Have you also known of our plan to spread a
dangerous flu virus throughout the city from this very
hospital?"
	Angie stepped out into view.  "Are you going to give
away the WHOLE plot for this episode or what?"
	Emerald's response was to simply laugh.
	Angie's eyes widened.  "OH NO!  We'll have none of
that while I'M around!"
	Before she could do anything however, Emerald
summoned her henchwench.  "Injector, destroy them!"
	As Sailor Jupiter ducked the huge giant needle fired
towards them she asked Angie "I thought its name was
Pharmako..."
	Doing the same Angie groaned.  "Don't worry about
that now, just get her!"
	Scott however lept into the air and fired off an
attack by shouting "Venus Crescent Beam SMASH!" before
diving to avoid being slashed by Injector's giant scalpel
arm.
	Somewhat instinctively Scott landed and thrust his
arm upward while yelling "Venus Love Chain Encircle!"  He
smiled widely when the impressive looking move worked and he
snared the monster's arm.  It didn't last however as he had
to dodge quickly to avoid yet another giant needle.
	As he flew through the air Scott marvelled at the
thrill of being in possession of such an athletic and agile
body, the exhilarating feeling of casting such magical
power from his very fingertips...
	...and the sheer embarassment of being pinned to
the wall by giant needles in some fanboy's fetish fantasy.
	His reaction was to scream.
	Really REALLY loud.
	Distracted by the sonic wail, Angie and the other
Scouts didn't notice Injector turn her attention towards
Rini.  As the little pink-haired girl screamed at a needle
barreling towards her, Scott swore he heard Angie cheering.
	Sure he and millions of others were as well, but
that's not the point...
	Naturally the cheers turned to boos when a rose
darted forth and shattered the needle against the ground.
	Tuxedo Mask, cape fluttering somewhat dramatically
in the air conditioner-generated wind, stepped forward and
began to open his mouth...
	...only to be shoved through a closed door buy a
VERY irate Sailor Mars!
	"Stupid baka Tuxedo Dork Boy!" she roared as she
slammed the door closed behind her.  "If you think I'm
gonna let you say one of your horrible speeches after
pulling that little stunt then forget about it!"
	"Um, Mars?  Why did you just do that?" asked a
new voice.
	Angie turned to great her.  Sailor Moon had
FINALLY arrived.  "Um...  I slipped?"
	"Guys...  HELP!!"
	Everyone spun to face Scott as Injector was
apparantly making the most of (yet) another distraction.
Injector fired a giant needle at him instead since Tuxedo
Mask was now absent!
	Jupiter lept into action firing a "Jupiter
Thunderclap Zap!" destroying the needle and Mercury
following her lead with "Mercury Bubbles...  Blast!"
creating a thick covering of fog blinding the bad guys.
	Next up was Mars.  With a huge smile on her face
Angie turned to Injector, started the motions, then shouted
"Buurningu Mandalaaa!"
	And nothing happened.
	She grumbled "Stupid dub..." before trying again...
	"Mars...  celestial...  fire...  c'mon-this-is-
taking-forever...  surround!"
	As the flames hit Injector, Sailor Moon stepped
forward to finish her off only to collapse suddenly.
	At that very moment, Tuxedo Mask reentered the
hallway to deliver his motivational speech, but Angie
instinctively slammed him into the wall before he could
utter a word.
	When Sailor Moon didn't move, Angie realized that
it was Tux's motivation that got her going again.  Tux
wasn't going to be saying anything for the next little
while.  From the way she shoved him he'll still be able to
eat solid food when he comes to if he's lucky.
	So Angie improvised.  Kneeling in front of Sailor
Moon she cupped her face and got close enough to the girl
so that she could feel Mars' breath on her neck.
	"Beat this monster and tonight we'll do what I
talked about on the phone earlier..." as she flicked Sailor
Moon's earlobe with her tongue.
	Serena snapped to.  "Him too?"
	Angie's grin was deadly.  "But of course..."
	Sailor Moon beamed.  "Thanks Mars!"
	Scott, though happy things were progressing towards
his being saved, still ended up with eyes the size of
dinner plates from their dialogue exchange.
	Regardless, the end result was the same...  for the
most part that is.
	After Sailor Moon destroyed Injector by casting her
"Moon Scepter Activation" on her, Scott was still Sailor
Venus and still pinned to the wall.  The reason they had
forgotten him this time was the different part.
	Angie was trying to get Sailor Moon to run off with
her.
	Upon seeing Tuxedo Mask get to his feet yet again,
Angie went to him to apologize.  However, Sailor Moon got
there first and turned to face her.  "Raye, why are you
always so mean to me and Darien?"
	Angie never missed a beat.  "I'm sorry Usa-- er,
Serena."  She took Sailor Moon into her arms and kissed her.
	Deeply.
	She broke the kiss.  "Let me make it up to you."
	Sailor Moon, though starry eyed, had one concern.
"But what about Darien?"
	"Mam--  Darien is a loser!  Run off with me!"  She
then scooped the girl up into her arms and began to walk off.
	Scott merely balked at the events unfolding before
him.  "Oh lord..."
	Angie suddenly paused in midstride, then leered at
Tux.  "Demo...  if he wants to JOIN us..."
	"Dear god it's her hentaific all over again!"  That
was Scott again.
	Angie shouted to him.  "It's 'Kami-sama' damn you!"
	Scott merely smiled smugly, as possible as he could
given his predicament that is.  "Not here it ain't."
	"I wonder what you'd look like Fireball Charged?"
	Cape-Boy was still a little afraid he'd be eating more
wall if he accepted that offer however, and had began to run
off thanks to the distraction.  Angie chased right after him.
She had forgotten what episode she was in, however, for as she
ran Sailor Moon began to droop lower and lower in her arms.
"Maybe we should wait until I'm healthy first..."
	Scott remained indignant.  Sailor Venus, pinned
helplessly to the wall, shouted "Get back here!  If I could
get free I'd..."
	"SQUICK!"
	He blinked.  "What the--?!"
	What had caught his attention wasn't anyone coming to
free him, as a matter of fact it was the exact reason WHY
neither Mercury nor Jupiter were doing so.
	Izzy.
	Let the tentacle hentai commence!
	"Oh...  my god." stated Scott as both the brunette
and blue-haired girl were completely into what the neko-tentacle
monster was doing to, with, for, around, because of, etc. etc.
	Suddenly he noticed one of Izzy's tentacles slithering
from his little cat body towards his position against the wall.
	Needless to say, Scott freaked.
	"STRAY TENTACLE!  STRAY TENTACLE!!  BAD THING!!!"
	Angie and her party had disappeared however while
Jupiter and Mercury were oblivious to his plight, and pretty
much everything else for that matter.
	Izzy, able to speak normally because of that, did.
	"Don't worry Scott-kun!  Just relax and enjoy it..."
	Scott winced as it began to wind up his bare right leg
like a vine.  He began to feel light-headed as it snaked its way
under his skirt.  He promptly began to see spots and bright
colours filling his vision.  Struggling, (in every meaning of
the word) the last words he was able to say before passing out
were "I sure hope that this bodice holds out..."

	The next thing Scott felt was a cold sensation, yet he
was bundled in warm blankets.  All of a sudden he sneezed.
	"Oh really Scott-kun you got that all in my fur!"
	Scott sat up and blinked.  "Artemis?"  He then noticed
the blonde hair hanging in front of his face.  "Oh yeah..."
When he noticed the little tentacles coming from the cat's
underbelly he then grabbed the blankets and pulled them over
himself whilest shrieking as only Mina can.  "IZZY!"
	Izzy sighed.  "Don't worry, I didn't do anything to
you while you were unconscious."
	Scott, though immensely relieved, was surprised.  "You
didn't?"
	Izzy looked at him with a pained look.  "Really now, I
may be a tentacle monster but I DO have standards."  He paused
in thought.  "Well, at least preferences, and I prefer my
playthings awake, otherwise it's no fun."
	Scott stared in disbelief.  "You're Angie's pet
alright..."  He looked around.  "Where's Luna at anyway?"
	Izzy grinned a very appropriate chesire grin.  "She's
been taken care of."
	Before he could comment the door slid open and in
walked Serena clad in the same nurse outfit from before, and
Rini.  Scott had expected this of course, but the sight of
Darien and Raye (Angie!) following in behind them was a
surprise.
	Scott looked to Angie, who was smiling brilliantly, and
sighed.  "So...  Ready?"
	Angie nodded.  "Yep!"  Just then Serena grabbed her hand.
	Their eyes met and the blonde spoke.  "I'll never forget
you."
	Behind her, Darien placed his hands on Angie's shoulders.
"Neither will I."
	Scott simply blinked.
	Angie turned to Darien.  "Remember what I said:  Corner
her in the bath."  She then gave a V for Victory sign.  "Believe
me it'll work!"
	Scott smiled smugly.  "At least I had the Japanese
versions."
	And with that, Angie willed the garnet into her hand
from subspace and they were swallowed up in a brilliant flash
of white...

	It was a scenic view, no one could deny that.  Small
pools scattered about the rural landscape as if ripped right
out of an artbook, or at least off a wallscroll.
	Though for all it's glory, Scott and Angie were still
stumped by the small wooden sign in front of them.
	"That LOOKS like Japanese, but I can't read it..."
stated Angie.  "Where's a Japanese version?"
	Scott looked at it warily.  "I think it's Chinese
actually."
	Angie looked hopeful.  "So you know what it says?"
	Scott frowned.  "Not a clue."
	Brushing aside the sweatdrop Angie looked at Scott
once more.  He was wearing loose black pants, an equally loose
shirt or oriental design, and of course, female anatomy topped
off by a crop of red hair tied back into a ponytail.
	Actually it was more along the lines of a pigtail...
	Scott frowned.  He'd been doing that since they
arrived.  "I KNOW we're in Ranma 1/2, and I KNOW that I'm
Ranma-chan right now, and if that sign is Chinese then I know
where we are too."
	"Really?" asked Angie.  "I don't like Ranma so you're
going to have to be the expert Scott-chan."
	Scott's eyes widened.  "I haven't actually SEEN any
Ranma though Angie..."
	"Dub-boy no baka..." she grumbled.  "Well, can you at
least tell me who I am?"
	"Akane I think."
	"What's she do?"
	"From what I know?  Beat up Ranma a lot."
	She grinned.  "That could prove promising..."
	"Actually, I think we should leave here as soon as
possible?"
	Angie blinked.  "How come?"
	"Well, the garnet may be powerful, but if I'm right
even it won't free us from Jusenkyo curses."
	Angie paled.  "You don't mean...?"
	Scott nodded solemnly.  "Yep.  Those."
	"That seals it.  We're leaving NOW."
	Upon seeing the garnet Scott lunged for it.  "NO!  I
want to pick where we go next!"
	Angie bopped him on the head.  This normally would have
created a simple fall to the ground, but in the Ranma 1/2
universe it created a sizable impact crater with Scott's
twitching Ranma-chan feet sticking up out of the dirt.
	"Though I could get to used to anything goes martial
arts ecchi-fu-chan, I want out of Ranma 1/2 as soon as
possible."  She raised the garnet.  "And Scott-chan, the only
way you get to use the garnet is through me..."
	That's when the white hit them...

	Scott blinked.  The garnet was right there, sitting in
his hand.
	Only it wasn't his hand.
	It was Angie's.
	"I'm you, and you're me?" asked Scott.
	"This is too weird..."
	"I hope we don't get stuck in this one as each other
because as much as I dislike being stalked by Lita, I really
don't want to be associated with your fanfic's crazy Pluto."
	Angie glared.  "Well, neither do I."
	Scott looked at her emphatically.  "Trust me, I REALLY
really really don't want to ne involved with that whacked out
Pluto."
	Angie was deadpan personified.  "You underestimate how
much I dislike Pluto."
	Scott rolled his eyes.  "Boo."
	Both of them blinked.
	Hard.
	Angie snatched up the garnet.  "We leave NOW."
	Scott sighed as he plomped unceremoniously to the
ground.  "I just want to go somewhere where I can rest for a
little bit."
	Angie looked somewhat sympathetic.  "OK, you want
to rest, then we'll find somewhere to--"
	And the white emerged once more...

	The whip flew out and ensnared itself around her right
wrist, making her swordarm immobile and causing her to drop her
blade.  Within the blink of an eye multiple chains and flails
wrapped themselves around her thighs, midsection and waist plus
binding her wrists all to the large tree.
	Pirotess had caught Deedlit.
	The dark elf spoke.  "I wondered what sort of challenge
a high elf would present."
	Deedlit answered her.  "So what do you want, peasant?"
	Pirotess grinned smugly.  "Your reputation as a stuck up
princess seems quite well deserved."
	The first of the purple clad vilainess' associates spoke
up.  "We should report to Wagnard immediately."
	She answered him.  "No.  We'll meet up at Fire Dragon
Mountain."
	The other associate took his turn.  "But what about the
consequences?"
	Her alluring victory smile was her only answer.
	The blonde high elf was looking rather disappointed with
herself for being caught however, until two daggers suddenly
impaled themselves into the bark on both sides of her face.  She
glared at her captors.
	With an outstretched hand and eyes closed the purple
clad dark elf began an incantation.  "I summon the powers of
darkness to do my bidding.  Come to me.  Drain the power of my
captive so that I may fulfill my mission."
	Deedlit's head sullened.
	"Sleep my prisoner." Pirotess said.  "Sleep..."
	As she fell under the spell, the dark elves got closer
and Pirotess leaned in...
	...and the scene was hit by a bright flash of light.
	Angie suddently realized she was looking into the
serene sleeping face of Deedlit from the Record Of Lodoss War
OAV.
	Quickly she began issuing orders and pointed to the
foilage above them.  "You two!  Secure the area!  I'll take
care of her."
	Both saluted and leapt into the trees with the sounds
of clanging swords quickly following.
	Angie however began to play with her captive.  "Hmm...
she's pretty cute."  She ran one white gloved hand along then
under the high elf's breastplate and rubbed one of Deedlit's
long ears between the fingers and thumb of the other.  "I like
what this is protecting, even if it looks kinda weird, but I
can't stand these donkey ears.  Too bad the outfit isn't the
ceremonial one though..."
	Deedlit could only moan appreciatively in response.
	Angie giggled until she heard she the battle cries
getting closer.  "Hmm, I should probably hurry..."  She leaned
in close to Deedlit's other ear and whispered "This spell
doesn't last long and the Marmo are going to Fire Dragon
Mountain, remember that."
	Suddenly Shiris lept from the trees causing Angie to
back away.  With one slash of her sword the red-haired woman
cut through Deedlit's bindings and the two fell to the
underbrush below.
	Angie rushed after them with the two returning male
dark elves at her side.  That is until one of them was cut
from sternum to smile and fell dead to the ground.
	As the surviving dark elves perched themselves on a
branch, a young man in brown armour and a green tunic stepped
forth, as did a large man with a long broadsword.  Shiris was
holding the still sleeping Deedlit on the ground.
	His sword drawn, the young man named Parn spoke.  "What
do you want with her?!"
	Angie was more concerned with the large man though.
With an obviously overexaggerated gasp she mumbled "You're a...?"
	"That's RIGHT!" Shiris brashly stated pointing to her
massive companion Orson.  "Even you guys are afraid of
berserkers! And he won't go easy on you because you're a lady!"
	Angie cooed.  "I think a retreat is in order."
	And with that she and the remaining associate lept into
the trees...

	Meanwhile, somewhere neither here nor there, Lita and
Seta-chan pondered in thought.
	Well, Seta pondered while leaning on her timestaff.  Lita
paced like a caged animal.
	"I wanna go after him right now!" she exclaimed.
	"You're rushing off after him haphazardly." replied the
Pluto.
	"So?"
	Seta sighed.  "You ALWAYS do that, Scott WRITES you that
way!"
	Lita stopped pacing to look her in the face.  "So?"
	"If you resist doing it, you'll start to break free of
him!"
	Now it was Lita's turn to ponder.  "I suppose you're
right."  She couldn't help her sudden urge to fidget, however.
"So now what do we do?"
	"We figure out where they went, where they will go and
the best opportunity to catch them"
	Lita blinked.  "You mean we don't even know where they
are yet?"
	"No," started the Pluto as she looked into the garnet
orb atop her timestaff.  "Which is another reason why you can't
just chase off after him."
	The dub Sailor narrowed her eyes.  "Angie writes you as
a pain in the ass on purpose doesn't she?"
	Seta took on an enigmatic smile as she continued staring
at the orb.  "Only half of the time.  The other half I'm just
inherantly like that."
	She turned to face the brunette, still smiling upon
seeing the bewildered look on her face.
	"Don't worry about it, it's a Pluto thing."

	Scott didn't know WHAT the hell was going on.
	He looked glumly into the reflective lake and sighed.
The sunset would turn to dusk soon, but the darkness was the
least of his worries.  It was figuring out just exactly who he
was, where he was, where "here" was and why he was there.  That
and finding out where Angie and the garnet had gotten to as
well.
	"I must've ended up in some AD&D adventure or something
instead of an anime this time."  He sighed again.  "I don't even
get to be with the pretty green-eyed blonde elfgirl either,
instead I have to BE the pretty green-eyed blonde elfgirl
herself."
	Out of the corner of his eye Scott noticed a pair of
pink eyes shimmering in the reflective water.  In the time it
took to do a double-take the eyes weren't there anymore.
Shrugging it off as an illusion caused by the setting sun he
began to walk towards a tree.
	"Damnit, I can't even shake this prissy walk.  I'm
swaying EVERYTHING here!"  A quick gust of wind causing the
floor-length royal blue cape and waist-length hair to billow
didn't help things.  Grabbing at the hair he said "How am I
supposed to manage this without a Mina bow?!"
	Hopping high up into the tree (as high elves are prone
to do), Scott managed a weak smile and sat on a branch.  He
kept his long legs crossed at the calves in a somewhat regal
pose though since the green tunic he wore had a SHORT loose
skirt which didn't cover much while his soft flat boots only
reached to mid-calf.
	Suddenly, many little glowing fairies started to fly
about him, a similar occurance to the many prior ones that
had distracted him already.  As they flew about his cupped
hands all he could do was giggle.
	Until an arm wrapped itself around his waist that is.
	Before he could do anything another hand covered his
mouth, the gloved index finger pushing between his shiny lips
then thrusting in and out.
	Scott was too busy being 'lost' as he found himself
instinctively sucking the finger that he didn't even notice
the first hand slowly move down and reach under his skirt for
a second set of lips to penetrate until a breathy voice
whispered into a long ear.
	"Miss me Scott-chan?"
	His eyes flew open as he shouted "NNGEE?!" into the
hand on his mouth.
	Letting go of him, Angie giggled.  "Hai!"
	Scott blinked as he faced her.  "I thought my outfit
was revealing.  I mean this breastplate is just that, a
BREASTplate.  But you...!"
	Angie, in the dark-skinned Pirotess, practically
posed.  The purple tunic had a skirt as long as Deedlit's,
but was infinitely tighter (emphasized by her crossing her
legs WELL above the knees), as was the top part which was
basically two straps of material covering her breasts.  It
redefined the word "cleavage" in more ways than one.  The
thigh-high heeled boots only served to accentuate the sultry
appearance.
	She ran one of her short-gloved hands through her
knee-length white hair, ponytailed near the small of her back.
	"Nice outfit, ne?  Ne?  Ne?"
	Scott blinked.  "Even though I think my elf is cuter,
I must admit that you are pretty damn hot, in an evil sort of
way."
	Angie gave a quick V sign an I giggled again.  "Arigato
Scott-chan!  And by the way, I'm Pirotess and you're Deedlit.
Any idea what anime we're in?"
	He thought for a moment.  "Deedlit and Pirotess?
They're from Lodoss War right?"
	"Yep!  What do you think so far?"
	"I'm thinking it's been a weird couple of hours."
	"Oro?"
	"Well the first thing I remember after we warped
out of the last place was a REALLY good feeling dream..."
Angie began to giggled softly at that, but Scott didn't
even seem to notice.  "...and then I wake up with these
guys all surrounding me and I've got this desire to tell
them about the 'Marmo' and 'Fire Dragon Mountain,'
whatever THOSE are."  He sighed yet again.  "And to top it
all off, I'm in THIS body!"
	Angie pondered a moment and suddenly smiled.  "You
know, that body DOES suit you Scott-chan:  the noble elfgirl."
	He sighed.  "First Lita back in Utena and now you?
It's just not fair..."
	"What's a body?" began Angie.  "Nearly a dress to be
worn and discarded with time?"
	"What?"
	"Baka."
	"What kind of armour is this anyway?" he continued,
pointing at his shoulders.  "I mean, isn't this overkill
considering anything below my chest is unprotected?"  He then
grabbed his own wrists.  "And what the hell are these?
Handless gloves?"
	Angie shrugged.  "So the character designer focused
more on looks than practicality, so what?"
	Scott frowned.  "Could I be any thinner either?  This
whole body is so slender!  Arms, legs, ears, my sword, my
fingers..."  He looked at said appendages.  "Hell, they're
perfectly manicured!  And you've even got make-up on!"
	Angie looked at him pointedly.  "Well you ARE going
with the natural beauty look as the heroine it seems, but
you've still got some lipgloss or something on too you know."
	Scott was practically frantic.  "Still, how the
heck can we have that kind of stuff in medieval times?!"
	The dark elf leaned over and put her arm around the
high elf's shoulders, which was tricky given the shoulderpads
of the armour.  "If you think about it too much you'll strain
yourself AGAIN..."  She looked at Scott's forehead and the
little three-stoned pendant held there by a thin string.
"Though what THAT is makes me curious."
	Scott felt the headband-thingie then looked at Angie.
"You're wearing one too you know, only it looks more like a
fishing lure with all the hooks straightened out."
	Angie looked up with her pale green eyes as if trying
to see her own forehead.  "True.  It's an elven cultural thing
I guess.  Though I REALLY hate these stupid ears."
	They unconsciously leaned against each other enjoying
the familiarity.  "So, what now?" asked Scott.
	"Well, in an hour or so you are going to ride with
those guys you saw earlier:  Parn's the dork in green and
beige, Shiris is the redhead who saved you and Orson's the big
guy.  Don't piss him off."
	The blonde cocked her head.  "Why not?"
	"Just trust me." she replied flatly.  "Anyway, you'll
meet up with them and then you'll go to that Fire Dragon
Mountain.  I'll head there too and we'll end up having a big
battle in the dragon's den."  She paused in thought.  "Hmmm..."
	"What?"
	"I'm just wondering where Izzy-chan is.  Maybe he's in
Shooting Star?"
	Scott was clueless (as usual).  "Shooting Star?
What's that?"
	Angie scrunched her face in thought.  "An ancient
dragon."
	Scott's elven eyes boggled.  "I don't want to
encounter a hentai tentacle -dragon-."  He tightly wrapped the
cape up around him and clutched the clasp.  "This is one elf
who does NOT want to be ravaged!"
	In an impressive feat of balance only two elves could
pull off without (intentional) injury, Angie straddled Scott
on the branch and cupped his face.  "Are you sure about that,
Scott-chan?" she asked as she ran her fingers along one of
Scott's ears once more.  
	Though he started to submit, Scott blinked.  "Uh, I
thought you hated these ears?"
	Her leer was unmistakable.  Nuzzling his neck she
mumbled "Wait'll you see what I can DO with them..."
	As she took the entire length of an ear into her mouth,
tongue gliding along the inside of it, Scott's only response
was with his green little elfgirl eyes:
	(o_O)

TO BE CONTINUED...

===============================================================

Scott:  (blink!)  Lodoss War isn't quite what I expected it
would be!  (feels an elongated ear)  Plus we're not even human
this time!

Angie:  Oh hush you, I'm having fun-chan!

Scott:  You would!  Look at you!

Angie:  (like, all innocent, and stuff)  What?

Scott:  (-_-)  You're unbelievable...

Angie:  (got an idea!)  Ne, want to see something REALLY
unbelievable?

Scott:  (this can't be good...)  What?

(Angie closed her Pirotess eyes in thought and suddenly
split into five little SD Chibi-Angies!)

Chibi-Angies:  (all 5 of 'em!)  KAWAII, NE?  NE?!  NE?!?

Scott:  (O_O)  Isn't that infringing on one of the
character profiles from Chaos' Fanbo--

Chibi-Angies:  (yep, all 5 of 'em again!)  SHUSH!  Dub-Boy
no baka!  ^_^  Besides, there's only FIVE of us!

Scott:  Um, I've never seen you do that before...  Why can
you now?

Chibi-Angie #1:  Because I can.

(As Scott facefaulted, one of the Chibi-Angie's wandered
off.  Behind her a shadow portal opened and she was suddenly
grabbed by a whip wrapping itself around her body.  With
nary a chance to shout she was pulled into the portal which
quickly closed behind her.)

Scott:  Alright that's enough fun, we've already wasted
practically the entire author's notes here as it is!
(looks around)  Hey, Where'd #4 go?

Chibi-Angie #2:  Doesn't matter!

Scott:  Wait!  Without her you can't properly reassemble
yourself yet!

Chibi-Angies:  (all... er, 4 of em!)  Sure we can, see!

(they reassembled into one once more, resuming the
appearance of a regular-sized Pirotess instead of the
chibi one.)

Scott:  How do you feel?

Angie:  (ponders)  Hmmmm...  (^_^)  YAY!  My inhibitions
are gone!

Scott:  You had inhibitions?  (faces Angie)  (O_O)  EEP!

(Angie's shadow loomed over him as the scene fades...)

*********************************************************

Questions? Comments? Arrows?
(thrawn27@hotmail.com, emporess88@hotmail.com or
darksong@worldserpent.org)
Webpage: http://members.tripod.com/~Thrawn27/plutosatt.html
also see carnage.fanfic.org for Chaos' Curse Of The Fanboys!